A few weeks ago, I saw several of my friends after a few years without seeing them. The pandemic has obviously complicated things, but I also left the Montreal area in 2019 to start a new career. So it’s been a long time since I’ve seen them, and I couldn’t wait to see them!
A few times during the event, I felt great discomfort on their part about my disease, the jokes I made about it, and I even felt something strangely akin to pity in the face of my situation.
When I felt that, I was really surprised. Pity? Honestly, I hadn’t even thought that you could feel that way about my life.!
The taboo of disease?
I wonder if this is a discomfort towards diseases in general!
Since I was young, I have been on a crusade against taboos. My mother used to tell me, “Everything can be said, but there is a way to say it.” Since that day I never stop myself from talking about difficult subjects. Obviously, I try to be cautious about how I approach them.
But above all, I do not hesitate to laugh at topics that are difficult to discuss.
There’s humor in everything!
Because like everything in life, illness too can be funny! It ends up being humourous, needing 4 tops of clothing because I’m too cold when everyone is in shorts. It can be funny, when I constantly lose the thread in a board game with my friends and we all allow ourselves to laugh about it. It makes me laugh, when I forget the word “sweater” and I have to say “tops of clothes” to make myself understood. 😛
I’m pretty much the first to be really sick in the people around me. Indeed, in an event, I will start losing bits of the discussion after a maximum of an hour, even if it is a good day for me. I don’t always look healthy either. And no, I can’t have children at the moment, it’s true. But I continue to live my life to the fullest, and to laugh daily !
I think maybe it’s because people don’t know how to talk about diseases. We don’t hear about them that often, despite the frequency of diseases in people’s lives. But it’s like any problem! It’s just something we experience, it’s not that special, a lot of people are sick.
Honestly, yes it’s not great what I’m going through, but I’m not going to die tomorrow. Yes my body is dying, but before that happens, there is still dialysis and transplant. I’m not going to die tomorrow. It’s important to remember that. It’s a bad time to pass. A long time, but still just a moment!
Living my life to the fullest
I may lack energy, but I still have a lot of free time! Between rests, I try to do things that make me feel good. I garden. I walk. I see friends (with a mask and without hugs!). I play with my cats. I organize parts of the house. I drink coffee. I read a novel, or an essay. I talk on the phone. I play with my daughter-in-law. I do a little cycling…
Drumrolls……..!
My new project which excites me the most is that I started writing a book!!! Yes yes, a book!!
It’s been a dream of mine since I was very young! I am an avid reader; I’ve always read every day. I would even say that reading is as much a part of my life as breathing!
There was a time when I also constantly wrote short stories and poetry. I even have a degree from the Cégep de Saint-Hyacinthe in Arts and Letters, Culture and Creation! I loved writing so much. On the other hand, I knew that I would not make it my first career. After Cégep, I went to get a bachelor’s degree in psychology, and finally got a master’s degree in business administration.
As I said earlier, I’m not short on time right now, so I thought this was the best time ever to get into writing my first novel. This project never left my mind and I knew I would one day do it. Well I’m going to take advantage of the lemons that life is trowing at me to still move my life forward!
I already have more than 6000 words in my book outline, it’s going well! I’m not in a hurry, it will take as long as it takes, but I’m really happy to take the time to realize my dream.
My life is not over until it is over
I could spend my time being sad about having to rest so much. And it happens to me several times a week/month, let’s not pretend here. But above all, I want to enjoy my life to the fullest, no matter what obstacles stand in my way!
So clearly no need to take pity on me! Whether I’m sick for another year or 4, I’ll still enjoy my life and fulfill my dreams! Nothing will stop me! With a small step a day, I always move forward, ready to laugh and with a smile on my face!
For more news, follow me on the different platforms!
